34 Years Ago…

I first realized that the world was not entirely my friend thirty-four years ago today. It was during that season when I always see the world through a veil of phlegm and tears, thanks to the dogwoods around my neighborhood and their incessant need to procreate.

Through my next-door neighbor’s window I saw my mother come running out our back door, her eyes watering more than mine and an expression on her face that she could only explain to me years later. At that moment, when she burst out into our yard, she was asking my brother why he couldn’t have made it look like an accident. My brother lay in his room with a gun in his hand. There are times when we all wish his death had been more ambiguous.